The Sunday Funnies & Factoids – The ‘Because You People Will Hound Me if I Don’t’ Edition

by Keith Lennox, All-len-All, o9/28/14 –

Happy Sunday one and all…….. beyond glorious here in the great white north.  Beautiful blues skies, mid-seventies temperature wise, chipmunks clamoring over me for my bag of peanuts, Owen stretched out in whatever room the sun is glowing the strongest in…… life, she be good.

Hope all is well with you guys and gals.  Sit back, relax and take a few minutes to learn some new tasty tidbits and perhaps get a chuckle or two.  I do apologize in advance for the last picture on this weeks SF&Fs…… but I just had to.  So, without further ado, it’s on with this weeks Sunday Funnies & Factoids.

dog sign1) The Jaws of Life were invented by George Hurst, who was a mechanical engineer and auto racing enthusiast. He conceived the idea after witnessing an accident at the Indy 500 where the driver died because he couldn’t be extracted from his car in time.

2) More people watched Elvis’s Aloha from Hawaii than the landing on the Moon….. jesus, a sure sign that the world is off of its rocker

3) Although better known for its food items, Sara Lee introduced the Wonderbra to the United States in 1994.

4) The United States’ first satellite, the Explorer I, weighed only 31 lbs.

dear motherfucker5) King Louis XIV lived and ruled so long (72 yrs) that he is not only the longest reigning ruler of Europe, but his successor, Louis XV, was neither his son, nor his grandson, but his great-grandson.

6) Although the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People clearly stated its mission in its title, W.E.B. Du Bois was the only African American on the NAACP’s first board of directors.

7) The U.S. Marine Corps is actually older than the United States itself, having been founded in 1775.

8) In August of 1957, baseball player Richie Ashburn hit a fan with a foul ball. A few minutes later he hit the same fan again while she was being taken out on a stretcher.

you're adopted9) William Shatner (Captain Kirk from Stak Trek) could never spread his fingers for the Vulcan greeting unless the studio crew taped or tied fishing line around his fingers.

10) Pablo Escobar’s Medellin Cartel spent $2,500 a month on rubber bands to hold all their cash.

11) 10 Rejection Letters Sent to Famous People – by Jennifer M Wood

IMAGE CREDIT:
THINKSTOCK

We’ve all heard that the road to success is paved with failure. But that doesn’t make rejection any easier to swallow. What does help? Knowing that the world’s most talented people have been there, too. Here are 10 actual rejection letters that prove it.

1. U2

Bono, The Edge, Larry Mullen, Jr., and Adam Clayton were just teenagers when they formed U2 in 1976. (Though they were originally known as The Larry Mullen Band, then Feedback, then The Hype.) By the fall of 1979, they had released their first single in Dublin, though it was with no thanks to London-based RSO Records, who had rejected the band’s submission in May of the same year. The reason, as briefly explained in a letter to the man sometimes known as Paul Hewson, was that it was “not suitable for us at present.” Within a year, U2 had signed with Island Records and released their first international single, “11 O’Clock Tick Tock.” Hmmm… wonder if they would be suitable for RSO now?

2. ANDY WARHOL

PAPERMAG

In 1956, Andy Warhol couldn’t give his work away. Yes, we mean that literally. On October 18th the artist received a letter from the Museum of Modern Art declining a drawing “which you so generously offered as a gift to the Museum.” Today, MoMA owns 168 of Warhol’s pieces.

3. SYLVIA PLATH

OpenCulture

At least Howard Moss, The New Yorker editor who (sort of) rejected Sylvia Plath’s Amnesiac, admitted that “Perhaps we’re being dense” in having trouble connecting the piece’s first and second sections.

4. MADONNA

PerezHilton.com

There’s no date on this rejection letter to Madonna’s team. But it must have been before she signed with Sire Records in 1982, a year before she released her first, self-titled album (which has sold more than 10 million copies worldwide).

5. KURT VONNEGUT

Letters of Note

Award-winning novelist Kurt Vonnegut took a certain amount of pride in being rejected. In 1949, he received a letter from Edward Weeks, editor of The Atlantic Monthly, who noted that two of the samples Vonnegut had sent the magazine “have drawn commendation although neither one is quite compelling enough for final acceptance.” A framed copy of the letter hangs in Indianapolis’ Kurt Vonnegut Memorial Library.

6. TIM BURTON

Letters of Note

As far as rejection goes, Tim Burton had it pretty easy. In 1976, while still a high-schooler, Burton sent a copy of his children’s book, The Giant Zlig, to Walt Disney Productions for publication consideration. Though it was rejected for being “too derivative of the Seuss works to be marketable,” editor T. Jeanette Kroger offered Burton some great—and mostly positive—feedback. A few years later, the company brought Burton on as an animator’s apprentice.

7. GERTRUDE STEIN

Anyone who has ever successfully managed to read the work of Gertrude Stein knows that her prose can be rather dense. Too dense for Arthur C. Fifield to even bother reading the full manuscript for The Making of Americans, which he declined—quite poetically—in 1912.

8. JIM LEE

Instagram

Today Jim Lee is one of the world’s best-known figures in the world of comic books; he’s an artist, a writer, and the co-publisher of DC Comics. But back in the mid-1980s, he was struggling to find his place in the industry, and being rejected by all of the major publishers, including the one he now runs (though a handwritten P.S. did tell him he had some interesting stuff and to keep at it). But his funniest rejection may have come from Marvel, when editor Eliot R. Brown told him “Your work looks as if it were done by four different people,” and suggests he “resubmit when your work is consistent and you have learned to draw hands.”

9. STIEG LARSSON

The Guardian

Though author Stieg Larsson didn’t live long enough to witness his own greatest success with the Millennium series, he did know the sting of rejection, beginning with his application to journalism school in Stockholm at the Joint Committee of Colleges of Journalism. In case you don’t speak Swedish, “This is a letter saying ‘you are not good enough to be a journalist’ to a man who went on to create a supremely creative, crusading magazine which fought against the worsening tide of extreme right thinking and activity in Sweden,” publisher Christopher MacLehose told The Guardian in 2011, right before the letter was auctioned off in London.

10. HUNTER S. THOMPSON

Dangerous Minds

Okay, so this letter wasn’t a rejection of Hunter S. Thompson. It was a rejection letter sent byHunter S. Thompson, to William McKeen, author of a 1991 biography of Thompson. The author at the heart of the story wasn’t a fan. After its publication, Thompson sent McKeen a handwritten review of the book, which McKeen framed.

drying baby12) Kentucky Derby fans may notice that race horses never walk to the starting gate alone. Horses are social animals, and thoroughbreds spend a lot of lonely time on the road. Therefore, it is traditional to bring their stable mate, or “companion pony” along to keep them soothed.

13) Three men served as president of the U.S. in 1841: William Henry Harrison, John Tyler, and Martin Van Buren.

14) Those doves released at weddings and other formal ceremonies are actually white homing pigeons. True ring-neck doves are bred to be kept as pets and rarely survive out of captivity.

15) Of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, 3 fell due to earthquakes, 2 due to fires, 1 probably never even existed, and only one stands today—The Pyramid of Khufu.

big ass

Ummmmm, I just have no words…….

16) The name for “piggy banks” comes from the use of family money jars in the Middle Ages made from a type of clay called pygg.

17) How old is the oldest ruling royal family? The current emperor of Japan, Akihito, claims to be the 125th descendent in his line.

18) History’s shortest war lasted 38 minutes. It was fought between Great Britain and Zanzibar.

19) There was a third Apple founder. Ronald Wayne sold his 10% stake for $800 in 1976.

20) A polar bear can smell a seal that’s 20 miles away.

Well, that’s a wrap, folks.  Hope you enjoyed your short detour to All-len-All today.  See ya’ back here next week.  Stay safe and happy until then and remember to make it your mission this week to pay it forward at least once this week…. there are no losers when  wedo.

 

Ciao,

 

Keith