The ‘Super Bowl’ Sunday Funnies & Factoids

By Keith Lennox, All-len-All, o1/02/15 –

Happy Super Bowl Sunday, one and all.  Gotta’ make chili, chill beer, prep snacks, clean the TV screen, shovel the driveway, do a load of laundry and run the dishwasher.

Enjoy your day and the latest installment of the Sunday Funnies & factoids….. you know the drill.

 

head orgasm1) Homer Simpson once had a theory that the universe was shaped like a donut. The theory has some validity, according to cosmologists.

2) Australian koalas are in danger of extinction because over half of them have chlamydia.

3) Living next to a nuclear plant gives you 100 times less radiation than eating a bag of potato chips every day.

4) In the 18th century, the U.S. Congress voted between the bald eagle and the turkey to represent the national symbol of pride. The turkey lost by a single vote.

5) A group of pandas is called an”embarrassment.”

6) In 5,000 years of human history, only one disease has been entirely eradicated: smallpox.

funny-pic-mcdonalds7) Bibliomancy is the practice by some people of opening the Bible at random to be guided by whatever verse they see first.

8) In a lifetime, your brain’s long-term memory can hold as many as 1 quadrillion (1 million billion) separate bits of information.

9) In Korea and Japan, there are Cat Cafes where you can go to drink coffee and hang out with felines for hours.

10) 70% of all the world’s spices come from India.

11) Computer Keyboards can carry more than 200 times as many bacteria as a toilet seat.

12) Humans and dogs are the only two species known to seek visual cues from another’s eyes. And dogs only do it with humans.

13) Chocolate magnate Milton Hershey canceled his reservations for the Titanic due to last minute business matters.

Classic-Best-Funny-Text-Messages-glitter-grow-some-550x35014) It takes up to 2,900 gallons of water to make a single pair of jeans.

15) In 2011, a Russian suicide bomber received an unexpected text message from its wireless carrier which triggered her belt bomb and killed her instantly.

16) German soccer player Mesut Ozil donated his €300,000 World Cup victory bonus to pay for surgery of 23 children in Brazil.

17) Nikola Tesla once “shook the poop out” of a constipated Mark Twain with an experiment.

18) Before alarm clocks were invented, there were “knocker-ups” who went tapping on client’s windows with long sticks until they were awake.

19) A gun with a silencer attached sounds about as loud as a car door being slammed. It’s much quieter than the usual “bang!” but it’s not as subtle as the little “whoosh” heard in James Bond films.

20) Chickens with white ear lobes lay white eggs, whereas chickens with red ear lobes lay brown eggs.

21) President Monroe was almost the second president to be elected unanimously (The first, and only, being George Washington). However, one elector voted for John Quincy Adams to make sure that President Washington was the only president ever elected unanimously.

referees

22) The NFL and AFL merged decades ago, but when the AFL was a new, upstart league in 1960, the older NFL felt so threatened that they created new teams specifically to prevent AFL teams from taking root. Among those teams: the Oakland Raiders were supposed to be the Minnesota Raiders until the NFL’s Vikings took the territory. The Dallas Texans were overshadowed by the NFL’s new Dallas Cowboys so much that the team moved to Kansas City in 1963.

1st-and-9144-american-football-demotivational-posters-134993406823) What do running back Walter Payton and wide receiver David Patten have in common? They both rushed for a touchdown, caught a touchdown pass, and threw a touchdown pass…all in the same game, in 1979 and 2001, respectively.

24) World War II diminished the ranks of players in the NFL to such a degree that teams had to temporarily merge. In 1943, the Pittsburgh Steelers merged with the Philadelphia Eagles; in 1944, the Steelers merged with the Chicago Cardinals.

25) In the last scoreless game in NFL history, the Detroit Lions and New York Giants ended in a 0-0 tie. That was in 1943.

dallas cowboys meme26) “Mr. Irrelevant” is the nickname given to the player picked dead last in each year’s NFL draft. Most players never go on to big NFL careers, and many never even step foot on the field, cut during the preseason. Mr. Irrelevant 1967 was college basketball star Jimmy Walker…who hadn’t played any football. (He went into the NBA instead.) A Mr. Irrelevant didn’t play in a Super Bowl until 1997: Marty Moore of the New England Patriots.

27) Who had the worst game in NFL history? It might be Jim Hardy. During the first game of the 1950 season, the Chicago Cardinals quarterback threw eight interceptions—still an NFL record.

28) Of the NFL’s 32 teams, 28 have made it to a Super Bowl. Four remain: the Houston Texans, the Jacksonville Jaguars, the Detroit Lions, and Cleveland Browns. Of those four, however, Houston, Jacksonville, and Detroit have all hosted a Super Bowl, leaving Cleveland the only NFL city to never experience Super Bowl glory.

 

Thanks for stopping by.  Have a great week ahead and I hope to see you back here next Sunday.

 

Ciao,

 

Keith